Oh. Yay. Party.

I am not a big party person. In fact, I really kinda hate socializing. It’s exhausting and boring and I don’t understand how people can do it. Things like going to a restaurant and meeting people: I’ll do it, but I get really anxious and fidgety once I’m done eating, and I can’t wait until we leave.

One of my roommates, A, keeps trying to get me to go out with her on the weekends. And I always say no. But then last night, she said that she was going to Chili’s for dessert, and asked if I wanted to come. I said sure. And then as we’re in the car driving there, she tells me that we’re going to a bar afterwards. Tricksy little hobbitses.

I didn’t mind hanging out at Chili’s and chatting, but that was mostly because they have these little computer things at each table so you can order food and pay at the table, but they also have games on them, so I was playing with that the whole time. I was still listening to the conversation, and even joined in sometimes, I just needed something else to do. Chatting is a muli-tasking type of activity. Or a procrastination type of activity. Not just a sit down at a table and talk for an hour type of activity.

The bar was awful, too, for the same reason. Sitting around and talking? So not my thing. The addition of one Smirnoff Ice did not suddenly make it appealing.

Tonight, there’s a big party, hosted by all the older grad students, for the first-year grad students. And I basically have to go. And it’s going to be awful. I have so many other things that I could be doing instead, like readings and preparing a presentation. And I would much rather be doing my homework than going to the party. I’ll probably try to drive myself, so that I can leave whenever, but I’m sure I’ll be expected to stay for a while.

Why is socializing such a big part of life? I mean, I don’t want to be a hermit, but I’ve got two roommates, I can just hang out with them. That’s enough for me. Any more than that and I get stressed. Seriously. It’s exhausting. (Family doesn’t count, I’m used to that.)

I also don’t mind if I’m at a party with someone else. If there’s someone else there and we’re just hanging out together, I can survive. But once they leave me to deal with the rest of the people, I’m done and want to go home.

I don’t like people. Can I just stay at home with my cat?

UPDATE: Fortunately, I was able to socialize and enjoy myself and have fun at the party for 4 hours! Unfortunately, we stayed at the party for 6 hours.

Published in: on September 17, 2011 at 2:32 pm  Leave a Comment